The last couple of years have been tough for Cthulhu Inc. The company has seen a steady decline since the 1930 when the company had a virtual monopoly in scaring.
Competition from new franchises like "Scary Clowns associates" and "Peek Oil ldt" has forced Cthulhu to take on smaller and smaller contract like country fairs and children's parties.
Long gone are the heydays when Chtulhu was a household name, and the mere name Cthulhu brought nightmares to people all around the globe.
At home the former Trophy wife, mrs Cthulhu spends her days in front of daytime soaps while the home turns to spoils.
Mr Cthulhus son refuses to follow in mr Cthulhus footsteps joining the family firm instead opting for a career in dance
The only highlight in mr Cthulhus life is taking the Shoggoth out for a walk scaring poodles....
The day started as any other for mr Cthulhu and his family. Expect for the friendly slobberings of the every hungry shoggoth the silence was deafening..
Commuting into town mr Cthulhu could swear he heard sniggering from a clown. Mr Cthulhu paid little heed to this, mr Cthulhus relationship towards clowns had alway been strained at best.
Arriving at the office door, mr Cthulhu noticed that his keycard had stopped working and when buzzing the intercom he only got evil laughters in return. Only after buzzing for fifteen minutes he was finally let in.
Mr Cthulhu finally reached his office only to meet a clown. The Scary clown franchise had made a hostile takeover finishing off Cthulhu inc with the stroke of a pen.
Two sturdy clowns helped mr Cthulhu out of his former office. Landing hard amongst the garbage mr Cthulhu hits a new low. What now for mr Cthulhu...
Strolling aimlessly mr Cthulhu ends up in the park, feeding the duck his lunch. S o depressed was mr Cthulhu that he failed to notice a poodle spotting him...
The poodle community is closely knit and soon there was not one poodle in town that didn't know that mr Cthulhu had been spotted without his Shoggoth
Lost in thought mr Cthulhu suddenly was awaken by a large amount of angry poodles heading towards him, this did not bode well..
Soon mr Cthulhu was running for his life, poodles have long memories and many where the poodle that bore scars from encounters with the Shoggoth. Hell hath no fury like a poodle scorned.
At last mr Cthulhu found safety in a tree, it soon was evident for mr Cthulhu that he was in for a long wait. For the first time of his life mr Cthulhu was afraid.
It was well into the night until rescue came. Mr Cthulhus son, worried that his father had failed to come home, had searched for him all over town aided by the Shoggots keen sense of smell.
Driving home in mr Cthulhus sons compact mr Cthulhu sat silent..
With his company in hands of scary clowns and not daring to venture outdoors due to hordes of rabid poodles mr Cthulhu is forced to stay indoors.
Mr Cthulhu tries to interest himself in his sons dance, but mr Cthulhus has lived a sheltered life, the intricacies of modern ballet passes him right by.
Mr Cthulhu joins his wife in front of the television. Mr Cthulhus utter lack of any rudimentary knowledge of celebrity culture and his persistent questions about the the plot lines of the soap operas soon puts Mrs Cthulhu in a borderline state.
The fact that Mr Cthulhu copes badly with alcohol, a mere martini puts him safely to sleep. Mr Cthulhus mammoth snoaring finally puts Mrs Cthulhu into action.
Mrs Cthulu removes her curlers puts on her battle face, fetches her son and
..head into town, no clown is to destroy her sanctuary..
Arriving in town, Mrs Cthulhu gives a card to her son with an address, she tells him to fetch a man living there.
At "Scary Clown" the CEO is enjoying the fiscal report on the year so far, the times sure are great for "Scary Clown"
Suddenly Mrs Cthulhu enters the room with a bang, stating she'll go Paleozoic on their asses if they do not return Cthulhu inc immediately. Instead of obeying Mrs Cthulhu the angry clown CEO pressed the alarm horn. Calling for help throwing the crazy woman out of the building.
Strange sounds could be heard all over town, what fiendish deed did the scary clowns do to Mrs Cthulhu?
In her softest voice Mrs Cthulhu restated her demands. Now that the clowns had a better understanding of the Paleozoic era, they were more than willing to comply with her every wish.
Back at the car Mrs Cthulhus son were waiting with a rather confused looking man dressed in a thawb. To be concluded tomorrow...
With combined forces the Cthulhus together dictates their story to the slightly confused gentleman.
and with some clever use of copy and paste they soon had a book finished, a guaranteed best seller
Working on a more scary outfit for Mr Cthulhus comeback the choice fell on leotards, the most scary clothes known to civilization.
With an generous advance on book sales, Mrs Cthulhu finally could afford a completely new way of living more in line of her deepest wishes.
Mr Cthulhu repositioned in his company again was the hottest name in the scaring industry, safe in the knowledge that if he were to be pestered by a competing scare company ..
he only had to sit down besides Mrs Cthulhu with some ill placed questions on soap plots to erase any upcoming firms from the scare sector. Mrs Cthulhu is very particular with her Television habits. THE END
A short story loosely based on characters created by HP Lovecraft.